The Joy of Detachment

“Detachment is a word that sends shudders down our spines, when it is simply an appreciation and acceptance that everything changes in life. Once we have this understanding, then we are better insured against life’s eventualities and that “Why me?” question.”

On Monday I was riding my bike, doing approximately 30 kilometres an hour, when I saw a bright blue car coming in the opposite direction.

As the car went past it let out a very loud boom. The sound startled me so much that I lost control of the bike and hit the pavement, head first. Fortunately I cracked my helmet and not my skull.

I was knocked out!

By the time I became conscious, I was surrounded by people and the paramedics.

After several hours in hospital, I was allowed to go home. Today as I sit here writing, apart from a few cuts, scrapes and bruises, I am eternally grateful that it wasn’t worse.

Inevitable Change

How quickly things can change. We think that we have our lives under control, but the reality is, life is unstable and unpredictable. At any moment it can turn. Not that we should be pessimistic and expect things to go wrong; it is just an understanding that we should nurture.

“As water on a lotus leaf is very unstable, life is extremely unsteady.” - Shankara

We must keep striving to improve ourselves, but at the same time cultivate an awareness that life is in a constant flux of change.

If we are willing to accept whatever happens to us, as it is, then the quality of our life soars. All we need to do is change our focus. Here is an exercise to help illustrate this:

Focus exercise

  1. Place your finger in front of your eyes and focus on your finger. You will find your finger is in focus and the background is out of focus.
  2. Now focus on the background. You will find the background now in focus and the finger is out of focus.

So it is with life. When we focus on our ego, we become attached and our life shrinks to a small fraction of its potential. But when we focus on our authentic self, then we become detached and our life expands to realise its true potential.


Detachment is a word that sends shudders down many peoples spines, because they misunderstand it as a loveless and joyless quality. However, nothing could be further from the truth.

Detachment is a beautiful quality, full of love and joy. It manifests in us when we disconnect from our ego and connect with who we really are.

Detachment is simply an understanding that everything changes in life. And when you rise above the changes and the “why me” mentality, then you will insure yourself against life’s knocks and shocks.

Anything can happen, like a bike accident, and you take it all in your stride. The best and worst of things can happen. Nothing shocks you.

Detachment gives you that capacity to see things as they are, and with that clear vision you can gain inner peace, love, joy and happiness.

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Related articles you might enjoy:
Just Be Yourself!
The Beauty of Surrender
Let it go!
What Makes You come Alive?
Your Purpose is to Be Yourself

Image Credit: Pawan Pandey

About Meredith Forder

Meredith is a writer, speaker, Self awareness mentor and the founder of Clear Thinking. She spends her time helping people discover their purpose and realise their potential, so that they can live happy and fulfilled lives. For more information please visit: